The saboteur we will focus on today is the Hyper-Achiever. Our society honors the achiever (think the Olympics!) so that is why the Hyper-Achiever Saboteur is so sneaky. People who have this as one of their saboteurs are often reluctant to let it go. They give it credit for driving their success. In some ways it has, but allowing the Hyper-Achiever to take over comes at a huge cost. Let’s take a closer look at this saboteur. The word “Hyper” is key. The Hyper-Achiever Saboteur drives the individual to directly connect their value as a person with constant and never ending achievement. This drive is unsustainable and leads to workaholic behaviors. With such focus on accomplishment close relationships are often sacrificed. In fact, the person driven by the Hyper-Achiever may fear creating close relationships because that person will then be able to see under the sleek veneer of accomplishment to the fears and flaws that lie beneath.
The Hyper-Achiever often looks great from the outside. They know how to create a positive and successful image. With the focus on image and self -promotion there is just no time left for introspection. The Hyper-Achiever covers up their fears and doubts with a beautiful picture of how they want to feel inside. The thoughts of the saboteur sound like – “I must be the best. Emotions just get in the way of achieving. I am worthy as long as I look good to others and keep winning. I must be efficient and effective – always.”
Each saboteur has their favorite lies and the Hyper Achiever’s are .. Life is about achieving. Showing up well allows me to get support and results. Feelings don’t help me achieve so dwelling on them is a waste of time. I will be worthy when I achieve.
Remember that I said the success the Hyper-Achiever attains comes at a huge cost? When you are run by the Hyper-Achiever you are never allowed but a few fleeting moments of peace and happiness. Once a goal is reached the Hyper-Achiever Saboteur is right there showing you the next mountain you must climb. If, horror of horrors you are not successful in an endeavor then your self -esteem plummets. Your only value is linked to your accomplishments. Then, because intimate relationships were not considered safe, no one is there to help pick you back up. Being driven by the Hyper-Achiever is often a lonely and anxiety-filled life. Always proving, always working, never good enough.
If this sounds like you, start to notice when the Hyper-Achiever is running you. Look it straight in it’s pushy, little eyes, take a deep breath. Ask yourself if you want to choose a different way to live. Achievement is wonderful when done from a solid foundation of knowing you are worthy because you are born that way. Then and only then will you be able to create from a place of joy.
Have an Amazing Monday (and everyday!)
Leanna Fredrich, Leadership, Career and Stress-Management Consultant
Leanna@amazingmondays.com
PS: If you want to take an assessment to identify your saboteurs here is the link –https://www.positiveintelligence.com/assessments/